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Hunter
Jul 25, 2008 15:42:19 GMT
Post by hunter on Jul 25, 2008 15:42:19 GMT
Hunter has been searching for years looking for poke-mon but he hasnt found any so Hunter decided to get up early at about 8:00 am in the morning and headed off to the kantex lab. At 11:00 he got there it was a long journey. He went inside and asked for a poke-mon. The professor laughed and laughed while holding his tummy. The professor said "we only have a squartle left... sorry" I said "ok i'll take Squartle" The professor was laughing again Hunter looked around and said "whats so funny?" The Professor said "Today no one has wanted a Squartle" Hunter was shocked and said "fine then" Hunter grinned "I want one please" The professor said " Here you go" The Professor handed over the Pokeball with the Squartle in. Hunter said "thank you" The Professor " So your all set to start your adventure first go to Route 1 and you will find all sorts of Poke-mon on low levels to train with. Good luck" Hunter was out the door in like 3 seconds...
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Hunter
Jul 25, 2008 16:28:49 GMT
Post by Nishrocks on Jul 25, 2008 16:28:49 GMT
First, you're powerplaying. You can't control other characters. Second, you keep switching tenses. Third, you are misusing common grammatical and spelling ettiquette.
Strike Three. Major FAIL.
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